Myths and Legends

We really have no idea what to put on this page and nobody ever has. If you have any ideas, let our webmanager know. For the minute, we’ll put some stuff that is referenced to in other places, or that are useful/interesting, or didn’t have a better place to go. This was directly copied from the past website, which was copied from the website before that, and so on, so god knows how old the original information really is. Still, that’s the point of myths and legends, is it not?

Flosscars

“Flosscars” is our annual award ceremony. It is so called because, in 2000, the awards are not just any old small magnetic Oscars, no, they are small magnetic Oscars with dental floss tied round their necks. This makes them entirely different and original. In 2001 the small magnetic Oscars were replaced by bendy men with floss tied round their necks and in 2002 by flosscards, ie luggage labels strung up with floss. So the important point is clearly the floss and any casual resemblance to other award ceremonies is purely accidental. Now (2023) they are cute little owl stickers. Much better.

Flosscars takes place at the cast party in Trinity term, and as nominations and votes are due before the performances of the current play, the awards period covers Trinity of the previous academic year, plus Michaelmas and Hilary of this academic year. However, in the early days it was an issue of much debate which shows should be considered for the Flosscars, which explains why Good Show, Jeeves! has been included twice, and there were four plays for the 2002 Flosscars.

To see the records of Flossers in years gone past, see the Flosscars Page.

Biscuit tax

At least one of the slogans we have used over the years is “Biscuits and Wine Since 1999”! OULES of years gone past, Elizabeth, gives a good explanation as to why:

“Picture the scene. It is Easter 2001, and Sue and I are pacing along a beach. Pacing pensively, and indeed sadly. A deep anxiety has opened up beneath us, where the casual observer might see only sand. Sue and I have promised to direct the OULES play in the following term, and it is to be the beautiful . This play shines, glimmers and indeed shimmers with so much wit and charm that it’s difficult to cut thoroughly. We are unlikely to make it less than 2 hours long. This does not matter from the point of view of audiences, as the play is for the summer, charity performance and so is not limited by what is reasonable to take to an old people’s home. Nor does it matter from the point of view of our actors, as we have a uniquely superb range of young OULES desperate for parts. But how will we find time to rehearse it all? We only have 2 rehearsals a week, and though they’re meant to be 2 hours long, the punctuality of the average OULE means that you get at most an hour’s rehearsing done.

A light shines. We have contemplated the psychology of the individual and obtained a plausible solution. OULES are essentially like puppies, and so the best way to train them is with biscuits. And thus we form our plan. It probably will not mean anyone’s any earlier to rehearsals, but it will mean there’re more biscuits around, and so Sue and I will worry less.”

And so “Biscuit Debt” was born. It works a little something like this:

If you are more than 15 minutes late for rehearsal, you must bring a packet of biscuits next time.
If you are more than 30 minutes late, you owe us 2 packets of biscuits.
If you are more than 45 minutes late, you owe us 3 packets of biscuits.
If you are more than an hour late, or fail to show up at all (without reasonable excuse), then you fall into wine-debt, and must bring a bottle of booze to the next rehearsal.

So there it is in a nutshell. We can say no more, although Elizabeth does have one more thing to say:

“This clearly teaches those young puppy-like OULEs that skiving rehearsals does not pay. For if booze is brought, I will drink it, and I will then be drunk, and it’s not in anyone’s interest to let that happen.”

Nowadays (well, 2023), the enforcement of Biscuit Tax comes down to a director-by-director basis and the provision of wine is more limited to parties (or when certain past Secretaries drink before rehearsals…), but it is a fact universally acknowledged that nobody objects to biscuits at rehearsals.

Family Tree

The OULES Family Tree works similar to college families at Oxford. New OULEs are adopted by older ones for arbitrary reasons that never seem to count. The main difference is our family tree doesn’t need to make sense. People can make any number of parents (a recent fresher being mass adopted by 7 people while at the pub) and you can have children with people you’re already related to. Most of us had lost track of exactly the relation of everyone else, and had given up on ever creating a full family tree. But, it still should be coming soon™.

It’s weird and it’s silly but that’s what OULES is about.

Spurious Words

You might think that a normal OULES performance is a precarious near-corpse experience, and everything should be done to maintain what gravity there is. You’d be wrong. Well, actually, you might well be right, but when we get a performance with an audience who aren’t quite worthy of our deepest respect and most artistic efforts (ie St. Peter’s JCR or a small handful of guiders in the middle of their dinner who weren’t expecting to see a play, we play a little game. You have a little list of words offstage. You try to fit them smoothly into your lines, or the closest approximation to your lines that you can remember onstage. Then they get ticked off the list and more are added. Everyone offstage laughs. Nobody onstage laughs, oh no. The audience look confused.

There are a few notable shows where this has been played, and the spurious words game is a key component in the Varsity Match!

Other Games

At various points over the last 15 years, OULES have played other silly games (not during shows, I should point out) of which providing a comprehensive list of would be nigh impossible. We play Improv Games, we play games we stole from the Radio, the Television, and games we made up entirely by ourselves (probably). Nevertheless, let’s have a go at providing this list:

Freeze!
“Move on but keep…”
Press Conference
“Hep!” (you WILL play this one)
Party Quirks
Mornington Crescent
Variations on Consequences
Cheddar Gorge
…and so so many more

Voles

VOLES is the catch-all term for assorted light entertainers.

VOLES originally stood for “Varsity Oxbridge Light Entertainment Society” (As always, blame Needham for the spurious acronym), but that was changed to “Vacation Of Light Entertainment Societies” when people from societies other than OULES and CULES started to come along. It now stands for “Various Origin Light Entertainment Societies”, and covers any time that lots of Light Entertainers from all over the place get together. (and it is now standard to refer to a Light Entertainer of any persuasion (be it OULES, CULES, USLES, ALES etc) as a “VOLE”)

VOLES normally get together twice per year. In the summer, we create an entire new show, although the last couple of years have been online. Which sort of defeats the point of meeting up. But we all have fun here, which is what matters.

Our second annual outing is at New Year, when we go away for a few days to celebrate the end of one year and the start of another. As it is usually a bit cold for outside things in December, we try to rent a Scout hut or something like that and spend our time playing silly games and watching DVDs or suggesting walks but in the end deciding we can’t be bothered. But I expect most of you knew all that anyway.

VOLES should not be confused with Questing Voles. Questing Voles is a group who produce shows at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, composed mostly of Light Entertainers. See their website or facebook page

The Website

The first new information of this page! Yes, after years and years of “Guys we need a new website” and then proceeding to not make a new website, the work has finally been put in, to create what you are currently reading (hello!)

The previous website is now the OULES Archive, to preserve all the history of the society, and also because it would be a massive pain in the backside to move every single page here. Perhaps one day, though, when a new Webmanager with a glint in their eye comes along, before the weight of thousands of lines of unmaintained code makes them wish they never joined the University, let alone the Society.

The websites before that… well they don’t work anymore. I’ll leave all the links here for posterity, and on the off-chance one magically comes back one day, but for now, yes, I know none of them work.